Dear Coleen,
I am facing a difficult situation with my husband who exhibits frequent outbursts of anger. While he is not physically violent, his verbal aggression is concerning, and I am contemplating the possibility of divorcing him due to his behavior. His anger is often triggered by minor incidents, leading to confrontations with strangers like road users, neighbors, shop assistants, and service personnel.
Dealing with his constant irritability has made me feel uncomfortable and fearful of his reactions. His tendency towards unreasonable anger has worsened over time, affecting our social interactions as people tend to avoid being around him. This has put a strain on our relationships and social life, impacting both of us negatively.
I believe that as individuals age, they may become less tolerant of certain triggers. However, it is crucial for my husband to recognize the underlying causes of his anger, which could be rooted in fear or anxiety. Having a sincere conversation with him about the impact of his behavior on our well-being and relationships is necessary. Encouraging him to seek professional help such as counseling, anger management, or cognitive behavioral therapy could be beneficial in addressing his anger issues.
Ultimately, he needs to acknowledge and take steps to manage his anger for his own well-being and the sake of our relationship. If he fails to address this issue seriously, I may need to consider what is best for my own happiness and peace of mind.
Thank you for any advice you can offer.
Best regards,
[Your Name]
Coleen advises that with age, people may become less tolerant of annoyances and stresses the importance of understanding the root causes of anger. She suggests having an open conversation with the husband about the impact of his behavior on their lives and relationships. Encouraging him to seek professional help like counseling or anger management is recommended to address the issue effectively. Ultimately, the husband needs to be willing to accept help and make changes for the betterment of his well-being and relationships.